confession tuesday

Photo by irenesuchocki

It's been awhile since I've done Tuesday confessions and I have a lot of things to share. I'm sure you do too, so if you decide to spill the beans head on over to the confessional at Poem Mom's.

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As you guys might have noticed by the scarcity of posts here, I've been really uninspired lately. I started the year so excited and then by late January, despite our insanely beautiful summery winter, everything became so blah. I don't even know how it happened, I guess it all started with my constantly aching TMJ and my anxieties of going to the dentist, work being crazy, my dysfunctional cellphone, etc. Of course, there's also that thing about my writing. I constantly find ways to procrastinate on writing because I'm not even compelled to write. I've only written one poem last month. Sigh.

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With work being stressful, I often find myself daydreaming about other places. Okay, I must admit, I've been only been dreaming about Paris, especially after looking at these pictures and watching The Red Ballon again. I can't really afford to travel anywhere right now but a little bit of magical thinking doesn't hurt, right?

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One of my goals this year is to dress up more. That is, wear more dresses and skirts instead of my usual jeans and top. Because while its initially flattering that most people think that I'm 20, its gets really annoying when you have 18 year-olds flirting at you in the subway. Besides, I do really want to wear dresses I'm just too lazy to dress up and put some make-up on.

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I spent the weekend in Sacramento to celebrate a friend's birthday. She lives right in the heart of the city so we walked everywhere. It was great to get away from my usual routine for awhile. Of course, since we were all girls, there was a lot of picture-taking and shopping. I must say, I was really good because I only bought 2 things and even then I was using a gift card. Yay for self-control!

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We watched the movie Revolutionary Road and was so moved by it that we ended talking about it for hours later. Sam Mendes did a really good job at portraying a young couple trapped in the illusion of a conventional marriage in the 50's and the acting was superb. In fact, I even forgot that they were Leonardo diCaprio and Kate Winslet, but just Frank and April, the main characters of the movie. A word of caution though, don't expect a romantic love story. This movie will make you think about marriage and really look at it in the eye.


  1. Oh, me too. I've been uninspired lately, but I've started learning to find something in everything. It can be a little annoying, forgetting the inspiration, but it can also be helpful if it's a powerful enough moment that I remember it.

  2. Great confession, Odessa. Sorry to hear so many things are stressful and glad you you got away with friends. Amazing that with all the shopping you kept your wallet safe. Good for you!

    I'll have to see the movie. It sounds great.

    The writing will come. Maybe you could try something super short, just to do it w/o stressing (no more needed, right?!).

  3. Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving a message!
    It was interesting to read you are trying to dress up more... It happened to me that last year I started buying dresses like crazy. And this summer it was all I wore...I think I only wore my favourite jeans on a weirdly chilly day in December (remember I´m in Argentina!). I guess it comes with the territory as we grow up.
    Don´t stress so much about your lack of inspiration! Live in the NOW and I promise you the cicadas will sing and the muses will come.
    All the best,

  4. If you can be open and available for your writing it will come. In my case, not being open is exactly why I have not been able to write through my funk. But it will come. It always does. Keep reading, too. That helps.

    I have a friend who can "get things." So I have Revolutionary Road at home waiting for me.

  5. I always dream about Paris. Thanks for sharing Odessa. xx, JP/deb

  6. January blahs. So even out there you get them. It must be the early sunsets. Things should be better now though, as the days are getting longer!

    E-mail me at and we can exchange our Facebook info!

  7. Ah, I've been married and divorced. I've already looked marriage in the eye. I'm older now and in love in a long-term relationship and you learn lasting love isn't romantic like new love but long love is good love.

    Love the pictures you post. I dream of hardwood floors and organized rooms. ((sighs))

    I'm not writing and I could spout off reasons, but the biggie really comes down to a lack of confidence. I really lack discipline and I honestly don't ever see myself learning to develop it which means my writing will always suffer for it.

    Oh, I confessed already. Back to our regularly scheduled program.

    Life is stressful. Try to take breaks. Have tea, long showers and a little physical release goes a long way.

    ((smack)) I'm am really revealing my wacky self today. I do wish you well. I enjoy coming by.

    p.s. I'm 44. Love how I feel in dresses and skirts, lip gloss and pretty earrings. What do I usually wear- jeans, casual slacks and no make-up. Go figure.